All clear

My diagnostic work all came back clear and negative. I am enormously relieved. I wasn’t completely satisfied when I left the office because I still longed for an explanation of why I had pain and why the tissue felt different. I’m pretty sure I have that now, so I’m feeling even better.

My primary doctor sent me a message tonight letting me know that the changes in density were probably due to reactivity of lymph nodes from tiny scratches I’ve acquired while gardening, combined with old mastitis scarring. I’m going to buy new gardening gloves to celebrate the end of this journey. Sexy, I know. I had mastitis three times while breastfeeding the boys. Twice with Charlie, once with Miles. I had no idea that it caused scarring and permanent tissue changes.

I also learned today, when handed a brochure entitled “Breast Pain”, that 70% of women experience it with unknown etiology at some point in their life. I’m guessing mine isn’t unknown but rather hormonal because of where I’m at in my cycle. It’s weird that it’s lasted for five days, but it’s possible all this stress made things worse than normal. The only time I recall breast discomfort lasting that long was the early weeks of pregnancy.

Yes, that did make me wonder. No, I’m not. I think what’s even less likely than me getting breast cancer is Harry’s vasectomy failing. But yes, I did freak out about that a bit until my period came.

I realized this afternoon that the last time I was in that imaging department was exactly three years ago today. I was 41-weeks pregnant with Miles, completing an ultrasound to check his fluid levels. I delivered him two days later, at the very end of a gorgeous spring day. So, now it’s time to focus my energies on celebrating my little guy. My LAST baby, who is officially leaving toddlerhood and becoming a little boy.

I am thankful I shared here, which basically means sharing with my friends and family on facebook but not taking up their entire newsfeed to do so and having chances to edit! One of the things that happened for me was just normalizing this. Prior to this, very few people have shared their experiences with me about these scares, so I first heard about them when I shared mine. And there were A LOT of messages in my inbox. I think it’s like this with so many topics- other health problems, miscarriage, fertility struggles, parenting challenges, marital struggles, etc… and I’m amazed at how many friends I have tackling these issues in the light, making them less taboo. They have inspired me.

Thank you so much for your prayers, encouragement, stories, humorous tidbits and concern. Thank you.

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